Monday, November 7, 2022

Fingernails and phone calls

My fingernails are too long.  And I need a haircut.  And I can't find my soap.

Okay, so why is this the fault of Telus, Koodo, BC Hydro, Shaw, and Canada Post?  Because I've been fighting with them for a month and a half.  Not all of them for all of that time: Telus and Koodo are the worst offenders.  But, cumulatively, I have wasted hundreds of hours dealing, or attempting to deal, with these utilities, and their lack of provision of service.  And their lack of customer support.  And their lack of technical support.  And their ridiculous websites, that offered to help, but don't.

Right now, I am supposed to be in a reconciliation meeting.  But, instead, I'm sitting in another office, to avoid annoying people with the music on hold that Koodo is currently blaring at me.

I have had to waste all of this time chasing down these people.  I have had to pursue them, rather than them pursuing me.  I am, after all, paying for the services.  But alerting them to the fact that there is a problem doesn't seem create any sense of urgency in them to fix the problem.  No, as long as I am paying the bill, they don't care if I'm not getting the service I'm paying for.  If I stop paying the bill, they just stop providing any service at all.

So, my time is being wasted.  This means that I can't finish unpacking.  It means that I can't figure out how I am going to live and work in my new place.  It means that I can't set up the systems and routines that normally I would need to live and work normally.  No, instead, I am constantly on the computer, arguing with their brain-dead artificial intelligence digital agents, supposedly providing baseline support and help, and actually providing almost nothing, except to waste time until I can get to the point where I can ask to talk to an agent.  And, of course, if anything else happens in the meantime I have to ignore that and stay on the line with them, because if I end the call I have to start all over again from the beginning and go through the whole ridiculous process.  Or I'm waiting on hold on the phone, waiting for them to deign to get back to me about whatever the problem is.  Or waiting for a call back from them.  Which comes at their convenience, not mine.

So, hours and hours wasted.  I haven't been able to unpack the stuff for the bathroom.  So I can't find my nail clippers.  So my nails are getting too long.  Actually, right now that's an advantage: the problem that I'm trying to get Koodo to deal with is the fact that the phone, which, after a month and a half of trying, and three days of piecemeal transfer, that they finally got working yesterday, one day after it actually started providing service, suddenly says "Unregistered SIM."  So, at their request, while I'm away from home, and any of the tools that might help, I have to pull the SIM card out of the phone and read the serial number off to them.  So, it's a good thing that I have long nails right now.

But, otherwise, it's not great that my fingernails are too long.  And it's not great that my hair is getting too long.  I haven't had time to go to a barber shop and get my haircut.  Literally.  I mean that literally: I have not had the short period of time that it would take to get to a barber shop when it's open.  I've been on the computer, or on the phone, with one or other of these various utilities, trying to deal with the mess of problems that they themselves have created.  I haven't been able to unpack the bathroom, so I can't find my soap.  I've got one bar of soap that I'm currently using for showers in the morning, but it's getting smaller and smaller.  I do have other soap in the boxes with the bathroom stuff.  I just haven't been able to unpack the boxes yet.  I haven't had the time, even though I can do that whenever I want.  Except that whenever I'm home, it's more urgent, from the utilities perspective, that I'd be on the phone or on their websites, dealing with them.  I cannot call them at my convenience because they won't answer.  Most of the time there's no way to call them anyway.  So I have to wait for them.  And wait.  And wait.  And wait.  And if I have other meetings, or if I'm doing something else, or if I'm helping out at the food bank, and they call, I have to take the call.  Right then.  At their convenience.  I have to drop what I'm doing or they will drop the call.  And then I have to start all over again, from the beginning.

And is it a short call, to solve the problem?  Of course not.  I have been on this call, for fifty minutes.  For the first half hour, the agent was demanding all kinds of stuff like me repeating the phone number, that was the issue, again and again.  And verifying my account number, and verifying my account.  And now I'm on hold, listening to some really awful music on hold, while the agent is contacting another "specialist."  So far, I've been twenty minutes on hold.  And, if past history is any indication, before she contacts the other specialist, Koodo's phone system will decide that the call has been on old long enough, and cut it off.  And I'll have to start all over again ...

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